Monday, August 25th, 2008...8:20 am
How to Mess with your MIL
You probably know I spent last week with the family. Friday afternoon, Puppy, Knute & I headed over to MIL’s house. You need to remember MIL is literally a throwback to 1950s. She was not allowed to go to college and is literally living in a Donna Reed-esque bubble of pretend happy. She doesn’t believe people under 21 drink and certainly would never believe anyone had sex before they were married. If you’ve been reading me for any length at all, you know that I am not the biggest fan of my IL’s and how much I love to ruffle feathers when I am given the chance. I’m a bitchy woman and I will never deny that I enjoy going in for the kill.
Puppy and his mother started talking about this gas station chain my youngest BIL (age 20) loves. It’s called Buck ees. It also just happens to have the worst mascot in history.
It’s a beaver. Yes. I know. I know. Which is exactly the reason my BIL loves it. He wears his Buc-ee hat proudly all over the place and his poor, slow, mother is none the wiser. MIL mentioned him also owning a pair of jammy bottoms with the beaver on it. I sat on the couch stunned, cause knowing his hormonal mind? That is meant to be all kinds of dirty. She proceeded to go and get them.
“They were navy blue, but they’ve faded. But, you can still see the beavers all over them.” she said so eloquently. I really tried not to giggle, but you know? My mind was in big time gutter mode. I just couldn’t help it. And, I looked at Puppy. Do I dare? Oh, hell. Yes, I do.
“I just think that mascot is tacky,” I said through an innocent smile. Puppy glared. MIL, not knowing a thing about double entendres smiled in her ignorance. She said something about it just being a cute beaver. I smirked. “I just think it’s tacky. They could pick a better mascot. I mean it’s a beaver.” Puppy gave me the look of death. I chose to ignore it. MIL said, “Well, aren’t they like squirrels?”
Tell me: would you have just let it go? Am I too childish for my own good?
62 Comments
August 25th, 2008 at 8:32 am
Bwahahahaha!
Burgh Babys last blog post..Bobbleheaaaaaaad
August 25th, 2008 at 8:34 am
snort!!! Next time I want pictures of the beaver pants.
And no, you should never let it go. It’s the small things in life you know.
nikkis last blog post..Fun Monday
August 25th, 2008 at 8:45 am
I would have added, “No, no. Squirrels are less hairy and smell worse. ”
Puppy would have died.
August 25th, 2008 at 8:50 am
Hmmmm. I’m thinking you should leave her alone because what if, in this bubble she’s in, something you do shatters it and she has some bizarre psychotic episode and ends up in a padded room rocking back and forth mumbling sewing instructions to herself??? Then Puppy might be pissed.
Unless, of course, you can get her a straightjacket with the beaver logo on it.
Sunshines last blog post..Slip Sliding Away
August 25th, 2008 at 8:52 am
Who knew there was a beaver epidemic in North Texas? To paraphrase the Catwoman’s hubby, Good for you, girl.
I must unearth the picture I took of the female beaver who is the mascot of Beaver’s truck stop. Yeah.
Sandys last blog post..You May Not Want to Explain This/explicit
August 25th, 2008 at 9:05 am
You did it so much more politely than I would’ve. LOL
August 25th, 2008 at 9:44 am
If you’re childish, so am I. I SO would’ve been rolling on the floor in laughter.
Sarahs last blog post..Weekly Winners - Extended Version
August 25th, 2008 at 10:03 am
Hahaha. I would not have been able to control myself–you did well.
Allisons last blog post..Haircut…Again
August 25th, 2008 at 10:25 am
The question is did you use the word “vagina” or did you go ghetto on the poor soul?
jills last blog post..What Makes You Laugh Today?
August 25th, 2008 at 11:33 am
Oh no, you are indeed the queen of evil and you acted appropriately. Beaver and squirrel are two entirely different pieces of tail. Er, have different tails! Yeah, that’s what I meant, different kinds of tails.
August 25th, 2008 at 12:05 pm
I used to be clueless as to what beaver meant myself — it’s not a term we use in the UK!!
I do only think it is your duty as the loving DIL to let her know just why everyone is giggling when she says the words “cute” and “beaver” in the same sentence!
August 25th, 2008 at 12:18 pm
I would have popped that Donna Reed happy bubble. Wow that sounds really wrong - much like that beaver.
Joannas last blog post..A Bit of This and A Bit of That
August 25th, 2008 at 12:28 pm
Dude, I love Buc-ees! They have the best snacks
Nope, I totally would have gone there.
That is too funny. Hard to imagine someone so naive, right?
I would have giggled myself sick.
The funniest was my hubs and our good friend Jaden explaining to my mom what moose knuckle and dirty sanchez were. I thought I was going to die from laughter.
rachels last blog post..Mouthwatering Monday: Campfire Burgers and Veggies
August 25th, 2008 at 1:05 pm
You are crazy girl!
I think what AudraAnna said would have been hi-lari-ous!
Smoochiefrogs last blog post..Weekly Winners 8/24/08
August 25th, 2008 at 1:34 pm
I would have pushed it further than that - It’s your duty as a good little DIL to save her from any embarrassment that could result from telling someone all about the beaver!!!!
And gosh, ain’t it fun to ruin someone’s day??
Your BIL probably wouldn’t thank you for it, though.
Eternal Sunshines last blog post..Busier than a one-eyed cat watchin two mouse holes
August 25th, 2008 at 1:36 pm
You must not ever let that kind of set-up go. Life is too short and you will live to regret it.
I just found your blog but I will be back. Too funny.
Debbies last blog post..Awkward Social Intercourse
August 25th, 2008 at 1:53 pm
I agree. Easy shots like that on a MIL are just too priceless. You should take them when you can.
melissazs last blog post..One Hundred Word Challenge 4
August 25th, 2008 at 2:00 pm
I would have been all over it like a fly on sheet.
Marias last blog post..Life without a traditional driveway.
August 25th, 2008 at 2:03 pm
Ah, the humor spoiled on such ignorance!
MamaGeeks last blog post..To Do.
August 25th, 2008 at 2:11 pm
You did the right thing.
Fleas last blog post..FINALLY!
August 25th, 2008 at 2:22 pm
There is nothing that is more fun to fuck with than innocence that won’t die.
lceels last blog post..I hate it when that happens
August 25th, 2008 at 2:22 pm
You can’t let opportunities like those go. It’s solid comedic gold!
Mrs. Kittys last blog post..The Silver Lining
August 25th, 2008 at 3:11 pm
I mean really, you’ve got to make the visits as enjoyable as possible for yourself, so I say go as far as you wanna go!
Catwomans last blog post..It’s My World, People Just Live In It
August 25th, 2008 at 3:14 pm
Hehehe. You are such a sass!
Kathryns last blog post..A Touchy Subject
August 25th, 2008 at 3:35 pm
I think you were very restrained, actually.
Knowledge is power, right? You were just helping her out.
Jerseygirl89s last blog post..Can You Force A Child To Become a Cross Dresser?
August 25th, 2008 at 4:00 pm
Ring, riiinnggg….
The 50’s just called, they want your mother in law back!!
Really, she doesn’t know what a beaver is…yikes!
Melissas last blog post..Doctor, Doctor, Gimme the News!!
August 25th, 2008 at 4:43 pm
Nope, I would have gone for it!!!!!
They used that term in the 50s, didn’t they?
Krystyns last blog post..They’re "all gone"
August 25th, 2008 at 4:46 pm
Since my daddy was a trucker I knew what a beaver was a long time than probably most people.
I’m just shocked MIL didn’t already know it.
August 25th, 2008 at 5:18 pm
yeah, we totally needed a beaver shot here.
the planet of janets last blog post..Something new for me!
August 25th, 2008 at 5:39 pm
oh dear… you didn’t let it go, did you? I love picturing Puppy in these situations.
Since you brought it up, here’s my TMI moment on your blog:
how tacky is it that my CB’ing fools for parents gave me the handle, “little beaver”?! I was 10 for cryin’ out loud!
no wonder I’ve got issues.
Im Being Held Hostages last blog post..Life’s a Party
August 25th, 2008 at 6:33 pm
Are they like squirrels? Um, yeah, they like nuts.
Brens last blog post..Hodgepodge
August 25th, 2008 at 9:39 pm
Ok, How fitting is it that I am watching the DNC and Michelle Obama’s brother just said “Go Beavers!?” Wow.
Yeah, I would’ve had a hard time holding it in myself. It was just SO easy… Proud of you for not taking it there. You are a strong woman.
Elaines last blog post..Blinded by the Socks
August 25th, 2008 at 9:48 pm
I’m impressed. I would have found it impossible not to laugh in front of Puppy and your MIL.
August 26th, 2008 at 4:25 am
As much as I despise my ILs, my tact would be to just laugh at her lack of knowledge because they don’t believe a thing I say- regardless of what it is. For instance, when I first met them (12 yrs ago), I said something about loving to eat at the Olive Garden. FIL replied, “oh, we don’t eat Mexican.” I said, “OG is Italian; you know, olives…italian, pasta….” MIL said, “No, it is Mexican and we don’t eat at restaurants that serve Mexican food. Too spicy.”
To this very day, they still swear that OG serves burritos and not pasta!
Tonis last blog post..Good Times
August 26th, 2008 at 8:08 am
OMG! Not sure what I would have done. Several years ago when we lived in another town there was a video store called Beaver Videos (and no, it wasn’t THAT kind of store), but the lady who owned it would actually go around to people’s houses picking up late movies and she had a little badge for herself that said “Beaver Eliminator.” Now what the hell that meant, I have no idea, but I could not stop laughing every time I thought of it!
Madame Queens last blog post..Princess Punkin-pie
August 26th, 2008 at 8:38 am
Wait! Did you leave her hanging?? I feel like you just left me hanging. What happened? I’m cracking up at P glaring at you - I can only imagine! Haha!
But no, I would not have let it go if it were me. I’m too mean for that.
Stephanies last blog post..An Offer We Could Not Refuse
August 26th, 2008 at 9:19 am
Someone her age and niavete needs to go down.
Oh, by the way…Oregon State University is the beaver…you are treading on dangerous ground. bwahaha
Karmyn Rs last blog post..Sharing a Little Corny in the Garden
August 26th, 2008 at 9:42 am
i find you to be just the right amount of childish.
if that helps.
hope you are well!
jc
jennifercaitlins last blog post..the first in a long line of freakouts, i’m sure
August 26th, 2008 at 10:00 am
that’s like saying would you please toss the salad. my mother didnt have a clue. my brothers busted up laughing and i was mortified. took it with good humor and mixed the salad greens lightly with the tongs. once it was explained to her, she hasn’t said it again.
jills last blog post..Fun Monday 600th Post–(Un)forgotten Trivia…
August 26th, 2008 at 11:15 am
You have gone so picking “on your husband” on me lately. I’m commenting just to comment, but I’ve decided to stop ranting.
Mikes last blog post..If it is Tuesday, it Must be RTT
August 26th, 2008 at 11:36 am
Oh man. THANKS of this post. That was awesome. Your MIL and mine would get a long famously.
ohmommys last blog post..Ummmmmmm…. I am giving away classy sassy SHOES!!!
August 26th, 2008 at 11:37 am
along
ohmommys last blog post..Ummmmmmm…. I am giving away classy sassy SHOES!!!
August 26th, 2008 at 11:52 am
OMG - would have loved to have seen Pup’s face……I would not have been able to leave it at all. So you’ll bge buying something beaver inspired for BIL’s Christmas present I hope - and this time take a photo of hubby’s face when the pressies are getting unwrapped…
mumof4s last blog post..Laughing in the bath.
August 26th, 2008 at 12:48 pm
you’re so cheeky!
Motherhood For Dummiess last blog post..Homemade Magnets
August 26th, 2008 at 1:54 pm
OMG, too funny. I imagine you MIL in a Donna Reed outfit in black and white (Like Pleasantville) holding a pair of boxers and showing them off Vanna.
The total lack of “getting it” reminds me of my FIL. My humor is lost on him and I usually have to explain a joke/comment to the point of it not being funny anymore.
Caras last blog post..Texture Try
August 26th, 2008 at 2:12 pm
I say let her keep going. Ignorance is truly bliss
Lisas last blog post..Rude @ssholes do exist, even in Texas
August 26th, 2008 at 2:13 pm
No. I wouldn’t have let it go. I’d have paid for it dearly in silent treatments, but it would have been worth it!
Jennifer, Playgroups are no place for childrens last blog post..Pudding rewards
August 26th, 2008 at 3:10 pm
See, if you can’t help but snigger and make childish jokes, then you are either English or truly an Anglophile…
Decided I should put my lurking days behind me, and start making comments!
Dylans last blog post..The Great American Conversational Disaster
August 26th, 2008 at 4:36 pm
You’re awesome and I totally would have done the same thing. And you should have taken it further, maybe along the lines of “well exactly how many beavers has he been in”. Then Puppy really would have squirmed.
amys last blog post..Back to School ‘08
August 26th, 2008 at 4:44 pm
I think you showed huge restraint…
…but I wouldn’t listen to me. I’m the wife who got kicked out of her husband’s vasectomy for giggling when the Dr. started talking about swelling and a 3rd testicle.
MommyCosms last blog post..Meet the MommyCosm Family
August 26th, 2008 at 6:22 pm
I should confess that my high school mascot was … you guessed it… a beaver. I can’t make this stuff up. You were very well behaved considering the great material you had.
Tara R.s last blog post..At least buy me a drink first…
August 26th, 2008 at 8:22 pm
I love it! I would do the same thing!
Michelles last blog post..They Had A Plan
August 26th, 2008 at 8:30 pm
oh, right there with you.
Denise @ EatPlayLoves last blog post..Tuesday Tips- Is Your Child’s Lunch Box Toxic?
August 26th, 2008 at 9:55 pm
Picking on your MIL… now why would ANYONE do something like that??
Just remember when Knute has his Mrs….
Rogers last blog post..I’ve Been Remiss In Accepting This Honor
August 27th, 2008 at 12:29 am
hee hee I would have smirked and giggled but remained silent - what did you do???
marmite and teas last blog post..A meeting with TreeBeard
August 27th, 2008 at 12:32 am
sorry that last bit didn’t make sense I meant what happened next? Did conversation move onto other things or did you explain further?
marmite and teas last blog post..A meeting with TreeBeard
August 27th, 2008 at 1:11 am
Let’s see here. My mil is known for her sneakiness when it comes to the ‘putdown’ jabs. Claims her innocence every. single. time. So if it was MY mil and this happened? Oh you bet I would have played with her a bit. Ok a lot. Gregg would have been shooting the daggers too but I would listen to him as much as he listens to me that his mother is a sneaky bag. Natta. So I would play blind, deaf and dumb just like he does…only I’d be saying “beaver” the entire time I played :o)
Joy T.s last blog post..No Matter What….I Believe In The Kindness Of Others
August 27th, 2008 at 12:10 pm
Karen’s totally right there, we don’t say ‘beaver’ in the UK, but rather, badger. The only reason I knew about the term from a young age was thanks to The Naked Gun series.
Great, great story! What a total riot! I wouldn’t have left it either. In fact, although my MIL is not a prude, there are a few terms that I have learned she doesn’t know. She told me that she used to call Bryan’s only brother (Brandon. Brandon Jeffrey, btw), by his initials. I repeated, “you called him B.J.?!” “Yeah, I thought it was cute…(?)” “Emm, BJ means something else” and then we went about trying to explain it.
I loved the backtrack you did too, such a great read.
Siobhans last blog post..Mind Your Grammars, Please
August 28th, 2008 at 9:36 am
Oh, I’m sure in a few years, her grandkids will clue her in!
Jennis last blog post..An Open Letter
August 28th, 2008 at 10:54 am
Just catching up - I CAN’T WAIT to see how this ends!
Amy @ Milk Breath & Margaritass last blog post..Wordless Wednesday - Rockies
September 1st, 2008 at 1:37 pm
You said beaver.
VDogs last blog post..More (Cuteness) Than A Mother Can Take
September 2nd, 2008 at 10:33 am
I want to know how you answered her question!
Colleens last blog post..Word to the Wise…
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