Sunday, April 12th, 2009...11:56 pm

Four!

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Apparently, even weekly is too much.  I’ll try to be by more often, but with naps a thing of the past, I feel like my free time has vanished.  I try to sneak by when I can, even if I don’t comment.

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Four years ago today, amidst the sounds of the Notre Dame Fight Song playing from my cell phone (which Daddy deems far too coincidental - just face it hon,  you have little choice here!), you arrived in my life.  And, it will never be the same.  I have a decent vocabulary, what with being an English teacher in my former life, but there are simply not enough eloquent words to contain all that you encompass in my life and in my heart.  You told me the other day you were “unique” and that unique meant “special…one-of-a-kind.”  Do you have any comprehension just how true that statement is? There will never be another you.

You are more than unique, sweetheart, you are the fulfillment of a promise I felt in my heart, even knowing you would be a boy, before your dad and I were married.  How did you manage to turn a name I picked out at nineteen and the words, “It’s a boy!” into the delight you have become today?  Motherhood is the most incredible experience of my life, and you were the one who enabled me to have that title, one I will never relinquish.

I chose to love your father.  It was a decision to choose that love.  With you, it was never a choice.  It was almost an instantaneous thunderbolt of emotion that left change in its wake.  And, that is how I see you: the vessel that parted waters and made me a different person.  That you chose me as your mother is something I get down on my knees and thank God for - because despite your faults, you have taught me beyond measure.  Regardless of how many degrees I may obtain, nothing has taught me more than you.

When I see the dawning of realization on your face as you figure something out, I know I am looking into your daddy’s eyes and his intelligence.  When I see you remember something inexplicably trivial from three months ago, I light up inside knowing you have your mother’s memory.  Your grandfather’s extrovertedness.  Your grandmother’s empathy.  The unbridled curiosity that is solely your own.  You are the amalgam of all those various wonderful qualities found in others joined with the ones that make you you.  You inspire all of us, son.

Thank you for allowing me to tag along on this ride.  Happy 4th Birthday, Knute.  I love you.

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Filed under Boys Rule, Crazy Tyke God Gave Me, Getting Older and Wiser, I love Knute, Makes the Stretch Marks Almost Tolerable, Mom! I know what we're going to do today!, Pregnancy Isn't for Wimps, happy b-days

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